My IUI went well yesterday. My RE did the procedure this time. Last time the other RE in the practice did it. Well, my RE is amazing. I didn't feel anything. I was worried though because last time it hurt. He did have a hard time finding my cervix. He kept moving the speculum around to find it. It really wasn't that uncomfortable. I'm thankful for yesterday's experience!
DH sperm count after wash was 46 million! Yippee! My RE said anything above 10 million is normal. We were happy with that news.
After the IUI I mentioned my zombie-like state on Prometrium. My RE said, you know what, just don't take it. I wasn't prepared for that answer but I said okay. I thought he would just say those side effects are normal, which he did say those can be side effects. I still have enough Prometrium to take until my period is suppose to start so I could still take it. I don't want the side effects but I'm willing to take it if it will prevent a miscarriage. Any suggestions?
Oh, and while we waited for the sperm, we went out to lunch. As soon as we sat down to eat, several mothers in work out clothes came in with their babies and toddlers in jogging strollers. They had just walked across the Copper Bridge (in Charleston). We thought they probably ate lunch together each Friday. They were all so cute! I was so jealous. I couldn't believe we had picked a place to eat filled with mommies and their children. We just laughed. Gosh, I hope our IUI worked.
The trigger shot went well. It was painless. As soon as DH pulled the needle out I turned around to look. I was bleeding a little bit. I think a little bit of the med came out with the blood, but what could we do? I wish I could be more relaxed and carefree about this whole experience; instead I'm the extreme opposite. DH assured me that everything would be ok. We followed the directions.
So like I said, the actual injection was painless. But not afterwards! The injection site is sore. It hurts when I sit down and put pressure on that side. And other news, I feel so heavy down there, maybe it's pressure I'm feeling. It hurts when I pee but not like a UTI. Maybe I'm not explaining my symptoms too well but something is definitely going on down there. Hopefully the trigger shot is doing it's job! Anyway, all of this will be worth it one day. I will happily deal with it all.
Our IUI is tomorrow morning at 11:30 AM. We'll have to get there at 10:30 for DH to do this thang. LOL! I'm looking forward to spending another day with him. My parents are visiting us this weekend. They are driving in tomorrow night. We're going to a lowcountry oyster roast on the river Saturday night. I won't be eating oysters though...yuck! I'm glad I won't have to start the progesterone suppositories until they leave. I'm a zombie on those things.
I was watching Oprah this afternoon. The episode was on hormone replacement therapy. I wasn't too interested until they started mentioning terms I am familiar with because of IF. A doctor on the show said that too much progesterone can lead to depression, lethargy and sleepiness. I can so relate!!!
Did any one watch Private Practice tonight? I started watching it but didn't finish. OMG! How painful did it look when they pushed the baby back inside of her? Scary! So did she end up keeping the baby? I wanted the adoptive family to have the baby like originally planned.
Update - My little student LOVED his gifts. He was so happy! He had the biggest smile on his face this morning.
I am taking my trigger shot at 12:30 AM. It's already 10:30 PM so I guess we'll just stay up. DH and I are watching the season premiere of Lost. I loved the first few seasons but now it just confuses me.
On Monday my nurse told me to take OPKs Tuesday and Wednesday. She said if they were positive on either day, call her. If they were negative, take the trigger shot tonight at 12:30 AM. I am following her orders. I took a couple OPKs yesterday, and then a couple today, and they were negative.
Today I went to Target to buy one of my students a coat, hat and gloves. I found a hat and gloves on clearance. They didn't have any coats so I went to Old Navy. I got him a fleece pullover and a hooded sweater. Oh, and I got him a lunch box because I'm going to start packing his lunch. I had fun buying all the goodies for his lunch. He'll be so proud of his new lunch box and lunch items. He gets free lunch from the school but lately his big sister (in fifth grade) has been packing his lunch. Today she packed him a piece of bread and 3 slices of a pickle. It really broke my heart. Today on the playground we tried to button up his coat because he his zipper was broken and most of the buttons were broken. I know my gifts are going to make him smile tomorrow. I can't wait to share them!
How do I ever go to Target without browsing through the baby section? I don't! As I was finishing my dreamy walk through I noticed a clearance section. How could I resist these precious baby leggings? Aren't they cute? I love them!
I was given false hope on Saturday. That "fill in" measured too many follicles that didn't need to be measured. They were too small and should have never been brought to my attention. The regular u/s lady, which I had today, said she doesn't even count follicles that measure 6 mm to 12 mm. She only counts 13 mm and up. So if she had done my u/s on Saturday, I would have been told I had one follicle at 13 mm. Which was exactly what I had because that same follicle was even bigger today. It was 16 mm.
My lining went from 8.1 to 8.8.
I was disappointed to hear the news. Only one follicle at 16 mm! I don't get it. I took less Follistim last month and I had a 20 mm on CD 10.
So here's our plan: continue with 50 IU of Follistim for the next two nights (unless I get a + OPK tomorrow or Wednesday). Take the trigger on Wednesday night at 12:30 AM and have the IUI on Friday at 11:30 AM.
I had to ask what would be the next step if this doesn't work. The nurse thinks my RE will be more aggressive. She said he will probably stop the Letrazole/Femara and start Follistim earlier.
I asked if we should cancel this cycle because I only have one follicle. The nurse said she wouldn't because I'm 24 and the quality of my eggs are probably really good. She reminded me that it only takes one egg and one of her patients just got pregnant with one egg after an IUI. I thought but aren't our chances higher with more than one?
I started crying before we got out the door. DH and I enjoyed a nice breakfast at Cracker Barrel. I'm feeling better now.
Question - Does any one think we should cancel? We aren't getting another u/s before the trigger. What if the 16 mm doesn't grow in the next two days? I would rather save the money for next month...I think!
DH and I started visiting a new Methodist church. I love it because it's Methodist and it's close to our house. We have a hard time getting to church on time. The church is just getting started. DH isn't a huge fan but I really like it. Maybe it's my calling to help the church get things started? I don't know. Anyway the pastor was discussing how easy is can be to just give up and stop trying (referring to starting the church). He said we must go forth and persevere. I thought about our journey of starting a family. I always wonder if we are doing the right thing by moving forward with these fertility treatments. They are so exhausting and stressful. I think I got my answer. DH and I must go forth and persevere because God is watching out for us. He's on our side. He has a plan. It will be worth it one day.
After church the pastor's wife introduced me to a lady that had two little ones: a Hispanic girl and a Caucasian boy. I figured the little girl was adopted but I wasn't sure about the little boy. She and her husband had trouble TTC. They did everything but IVF. Afterwards they pursued international adoption and adopted their little girl from Guatemala. She is a precious 2 year old now. She said right before going to Guatemala they were shocked to find out they were pregnant with a little boy. It happened when they least expected it. Isn't that wild?!?!
She completely understood the emotions involved with TTC. She said adopting is an emotional rollercoaster as well. She said they had numerous meetings with their social workers. They were told to be ready in two weeks. Then plans would change or be delayed. Now she says it was worth EVERYTHING they went through! She said they wouldn't have their little girl if they hadn't struggled with TTC.
It make me smile to see her with her family. She's been in my shoes but now look what she has. I almost wanted to cry tears of happiness for her. She's blessed and I hope to be one day. I can't wait! Her story gave me hope.
If we ever get pregnant and then find out it's a girl, we're getting this crib for our nursery. I just found it on babiesrus.com and I'm in love. It has a matching changing table that I found on target.com. The set would be perfect with the PB crib linens that my MIL purchased. Yes, the ones she bought for her grandchild that hasn't been conceived yet. Why? Because I fell in love with them last summer. The colors in the linens are white and green - perfect with a powder pink crib!
Our alarm clock went off at 5 this morning. DH had to drag me out of bed. We've missed sleeping in on Saturdays. We started on our 2 hour trip to Charleston at 6 because we had to be there at 8. DH always drives and I always sleep. I do wake up for breakfast - usually fast food - yuck! But hey, it's quick and we don't leave early enough to stop and sit down at Cracker Barrel or IHOP.
The ultrasound was a little painful. Um, like when she did two sharp 90 degree turns to my left and right ovaries. When I finally realized how hard I was pushing on those stirrups, I decided to stop trying to push away. It wasn't coming out and I just needed to relax. I tried but it didn't help. DH thinks she's really shoved it up there because he saw how far the KY went down on the stick thingy. He said "Wow, she really put it up there today!" Oh, the joys of ultrasounds. I love my DH and can't imagine doing any of this without him. He's been right there by my side for everything. He's says since you're the one going through all the ultrasounds, procedures, etc. I will do all the driving and be right there by your side.
The ultrasound tech was a "fill in." Maybe she's not experienced and that's why she wasn't gentle OR maybe she didn't want to be there.
We met with our nurse and she explained that the "fill in" measured LOTS of follicles. She said they usually don't measure all those smaller ones but "fill in" did. She measured a total of 10! 6 follicles were between 6 mm and 9 mm (mostly 9 mm). The other 4 were 11 mm, 11 mm, 12 mm and 13 mm: 11 and 12 on left, 11 and 13 on right. Our nurse said we will definitely have more than one follicle this month. She said if we have too many they can aspirate some. ASPIRATE! That didn't sound nice and it really freaked me out. I asked her about the pain associated with aspiration and she said they sedate you...WTF? I am still excited that we will have more than one this time! She talked with my doctor and here's our plan: 2 more nights of Follistim (50 IU a night) and another ultrasound on Monday.
Oh, and how cool is this? After last night's injection we were officially out of Follistim. I told the nurse and she just GAVE me a 600 IU cartridge of Follistim. That's like $600 worth of Follistim for FREE! Although insurance would have covered 70%, that was still really nice of her. If this cycle doesn't work (why did I just say that, it's going it work), we will have plenty of Follistim for next month!
Update - I forgot to mention that my lining was at 8.
Ok, so I just gave myself another Follistim injection. DH timed my 5 second wait. I even kept the needle in for an extra 5 seconds. DH kept saying, ok, take it out, you can take it out now, TAKE IT OUT! I pulled it out VERY slowly. I feel so much better about tonight's injection. There wasn't any medicine on my skin or any medicine coming out of the needle.
THANK YOU for your comments about last night's experience. I appreciate your advice!
I completely forgot to take my last pill (Letrazole/Femara) this morning. I was so busy at school that it didn't even cross my mind until the last kid left at 3:15! Of course I went into panic mode because I'm OCD about taking my meds at the same exact time every day. I took the pill and called my nurse. She calmly assured me that it would be ok.
I took my first Follistim injection tonight. It was quick, easy and painless. After I pulled the needle out I thought I saw a droplet of clear liquid on my skin. I quickly pressed the alcohol swab down on the injection site. Now I'm worried that droplet was medicine that came out. But that really can't happen, right? Maybe I'm crazy and didn't really see what I thought I saw? I wish I didn't worry so much.
I'm ready for Saturday. I can't wait to find out how many follicles are ready, if any!
I had a day 3 ultrasound this morning. All was well. I had 11 tiny follicles on my left ovary and 15 tiny follicles on my right ovary. My RE decided to up my Follistim just a little. Hopefully that will help grow more than 1 good follicle. I started my Letrazole/Femara this morning. Let's all say a prayer for me, you and any one else struggling. I really want our prayers to be answered this month.
Oh, and I have good news. I probably will not have to take any sick days. My next ultrasound will be on Saturday. If I'm ready to go then I will trigger that night and have the IUI on Monday. I'm out of school on Monday for MLK Day. I'm so glad we didn't delay this IUI because of sick days. Life is surprising and good, sometimes! ;)
DH and I went to see Marley and Me over Christmas break. It was great. Tonight we went to see Gran Torino. I wasn't a big fan of going to see it but afterwards I was pleasantly surprised. It was wonderful. I highly recommend going to see it.
Let's get it started! Let's get is started in here! Wooo hooo!
I have to admit. I was very down about my first IUI ending with so many BFNs. The thought of possibly taking a break really bothered me too. We thought about it for a realistic reason: taking too many days off work. I have to take sick days for my appointments because my doctor's office is 2 hours away. Since I've only taught 2 years I only have about 20 sick days. I don't want to use any more days but oh well. I'll be using them! I may not have a lot of sick days left for maternity leave but we'll survive.
So anyway, I went from being down to being excited again. Why? I started AF today, ordered my meds, and set up my day 3 u/s for Saturday morning. My nurse was going to check with my doctor about moving up my dosage of Follistim. She said he may not go for it but I wanted her to ask because I only had one follicle last time. I'll keep you updated.
Knock, knock! Where are you AF? I'm ready to start the meds for IUI #2.
We've decided to move forward with a second IUI. We thought about waiting until the summer months but decided against it. We decided I couldn't handle "waiting patiently" for six more months.
I'm hoping this cycle will be less stressful. We don't have any big plans for the month. I am familiar with the meds and the procedures. Life should be good with a miracle in the making.
I hope. I pray. I wonder.
12dpIUI = BFN
13dpIUI = BFN
I've got three tests left. One for tomorrow, Monday and Tuesday. By the way, Tuesday will be the 28th day of my cycle. Yes, I know, they will probably be BFNs but I'm taking them anyway. I still have a tiny bit of hope even though I'm pretty sure we're not pregnant.
My bbs are still extremely sore and I am exhausted beyond words. How am I going to function in the classroom on Monday? I can't wait to stop taking Prometrium. My doctor said that if I'm pregnant I'll take it until my 8th or 9th week. Whoa, I can't imagine! My doctor also said if I get a BFN on 16dpIUI, to stop taking it.
DH and I have been discussing what we hoped we wouldn't have to discuss: what next? We can't decide if we want to do another IUI cycle this month, or wait until I'm out of school in the summer. Decisions, decisions, and damn it, why us?
Updates:
14dpIUI = BFN :(
15dpIUI = BFN :(
16dpIUI = BFN :(
Ok, no more, I can't stand it.
I gave in and took a HPT. It was negative.
So there's no way I could be pregnant, right? The HCG from the trigger is obviously out of my system and my body isn't producing HCG, or it would have been detected in the HPT.
I'm sad but not devastated, yet. I'm going to take a nap now.
