Second Beta

So far, so good! My second beta came back at 399. It was taken at 11dp5dt or 16 days past ovulation. My first beta was 209 so my second beta revealed a 91% increase in 48 hours. I think it's just one baby but DH thinks it's two. What do you think?

According to this web site it could be twins:

http://www.betabase.info/showBasicChart.php?type=Twin

According to this web site it could be high levels for a singleton:

http://babymed.com/Tools/Pregnancy/hCG/Default.aspx

My next beta is scheduled for Thursday, July 23rd. It will be 18dp5dt or 23 days past ovulation. My first ultrasound will be scheduled three weeks from my first beta which was July 14th. So it will be around the first week in August. I can't wait! I hope it makes all my worries go away. I wish I wasn't worried about anything but I am and I can't help it. I guess that's what infertility does to you. It's like I'm waiting to wake up from a really good dream. It all still seems too good to be true.

First Beta

Sister, sister!

Celebrating together in TN!

Thank you for all of your precious comments. Your kindness means so much to me. I'm so thankful for all of your love and support! I'm visiting family in Nashville, TN so sorry for the late beta update. I haven't had any time to get online. I'll be back home in a couple days and posting more often. Anyway, we're having a wonderful time celebrating my pregnancy.

So here's a quick update on my first beta. It was 208 at 9dp5dt or 14 days past ER. I'm going in for my second beta tomorrow morning which is 11dp5dt or 16 days past ER. My nurse said I'm definitely pregnant and my first beta is a good number. I haven't had much time to google my number. I wonder if it's normal or high. I wonder if we've got one or two. I asked my nurse and she said there is no way to tell because some women have high numbers and only have one AND some women have low numbers and have two. So who knows?!?!

I feel so happy and complete -- almost like a hole has been filled in my heart. Infertility definitely put that hole in my heart but thank goodness it's been filled. I just want to smile all the time and tell everyone I'm pregnant. I feel excited. I feel a sense of peace. It's great to be 4 weeks and 1 day pregnant!

Oh and a symptom update: emotional, sensitive bbs, stomach issues (cramps and constipated), cramps like AF is going to arrive (no spotting though), some sharp pains and/or twinges, dizzy throughout day (probably due to Prometrium) and very tired/exhausted/sleepy.

BFP at 7dp5dt

I'm Pregnant!!!

First of all if you are struggling with TTC please know that I know how it feels to read a BFP post. It's exciting and you're happy for the blogger but your sad for yourself. It makes you feel like your BFP is even further away or like you will never get a BFP. I've felt those feelings sooo many times! I thought I'd never be able to post a BFP post. Even a couple days before I tested I was convinced I wasn't pregnant. I didn't think I was lucky enough. I didn't think anything good could come from such bad ER and OHSS experiences. I know it's still early but hey, a BFP is a BFP and we're celebrating! I've got my beta on Tuesday morning. My next beta will be on Thursday if Tuesday's beta is positive. I'm pretty sure it will be because the lines are getting darker each day. Thank you for all of your support and prayers. You're still in my thoughts and prayers.

Barely there but it's there! It showed up within 30 seconds or so!

When DH came home from work I surprised him.

The cake I decorated for DH. I bought a plain white cake from the grocery store. I decorated it with blue and pink icing. We also used this cake to tell my parents we were pregnant.

Still in shock!

Amazed and in complete bliss!

Oh and a symptom update: very emotional, sore bbs, still a little dizzy at times, cramps every once and awhile (sometimes it feels like AF is on her way), bloated -- it's back like OHSS style, so I've started chugging Gatorade again and very tired/exhausted/sleepy.

Must See

You must see this funny commercial featuring cute little ones! I saw it on the Today Show this morning. It makes me laugh each time I watch it. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQcVllWpwGs

3dp5dt

I'm only 3dp5dt (3 days past a 5 day transfer) or 8dpo (8 days past ovulation). I'm so ready to know if this cycle was a success. I'm ready for that feeling of complete bliss and excitement OR that feeling of "I'm ready to move on. What's the next step?"

Q and I went out this morning to shop and have lunch. We had a great time. It was so nice getting out and about. Q's been a major support system for me and she just started an IF blog: Little Bean ????. Please welcome her to the world of IF blogs. She's meeting with our RE on Friday for a consultation and possibly scheduling her first IUI!

I'm still having dull cramps throughout the day. I've had a couple head aches, body aches and spells of dizziness. When this happens I know that I just need to lay down and I'll feel better. I'm not sure if these symptoms are related to OHSS or what?!?! It makes me wonder what is going on down there. Have the embryos attached? If so, are they growing?

Oh and special congrats to:

JUST WANT TO BE A MOM

(BFP with IVF #1)

and

PRAYING FOR OUR LITTLE ONE TO COME...

(BFP with IVF #2)

Bed Rest

Smile though your heart is aching;

Smile even though it's breaking.

When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by.

If you smile through your fear and sorrow,

Smile and maybe tomorrow,

You'll see the sun come shining through for you.

Light up your face with gladness,

Hide every trace of sadness.

Although a tear may be ever so near,

That's the time you must keep on trying,

Smile, what's the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile,

If you just smile.

That's the time you must keep on trying,

Smile, what's the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile.

I'm not a huge Michael Jackson fan but since I'm on bed rest I watched his memorial service this afternoon. I cried a few times...so not like me!!! I'm sure the tears are from all the IVF meds I've been taking lately and continue to take. I did love the song above that Michael Jackson's brother sang. It reminded me that I should smile through these trying times and remember that life is still worthwhile even if this IVF cycle isn't successful.

I'm finally feeling well today. The fluid is going away because my stomach is going back down and my weight is going down as well. I'm on my last day of bed rest which is seven days past my ER and two days past my transfer. I'm looking forward to having a normal day tomorrow. I'm still going to relax and take it easy though.

I'm sooo ready to know if we're pregnant! I think I'll probably test early. I'm going out of town with my Mom and sister on Sunday. I won't see DH for a few days. I would love to get a BFP with him this Friday (5dp5dt) or Saturday (6dp5dt) so we could celebrate before I leave. I know it's SUPER early to get a BFP on those days BUT it has happened. I've read about it in several blogs. I asked my nurse how soon I could test at home and she said to wait at least ten days past the trigger (that's tomorrow). She also said that my RE's protocol has been known to give false positives and false negatives when testing at home early.

Oh and a symptom update: dull AF like cramps last night and this morning, sore bbs and very emotional.

Transfer and Frosty News

Our two transferred embryos...

...in my uterus!

Well, I'm feeling better...I guess. Nights are usually worse than days. I didn't sleep the night before the transfer. My stomach cramps and shoulder pains were too excruciating -- OHSS related. I just sat straight up in bed all night. It was the most comfortable way to rest. I couldn't get excited about the transfer because I was so exhausted that morning. I cried in DH's arms but then pulled myself together and off we drove to Charleston. DH made a bed in the back of my Murano. He put an air mattress with a soft mattress topper in the back. It was for me to lay on after the transfer (we had a two hour drive home). We laughed about it. Here's a picture of my view on the way home.

By the way, thanks for the heating pad recommendation. We bought one and I've been using it on my upper back and shoulders. It relieves the pain temporarily. And someone asked what was causing the pain. It's from the fluid that's building up in my stomach -- the fluid is being produced from my huge ovaries. The fluid presses on my diaphragm and causes serious pain in my back and shoulders. It's worse when you lay down because the fluid pushes harder on your diaphragm. It feels better to sit up because the fluid is pushing down, not up. Does that make sense?

So anyway I took my Valium an hour before my transfer. We arrived and talked with the RE about my stomach cramps and shoulder pains. He said it was related to OHSS. He said I'll continue to deal with these symptoms for the next week or so. DH and I got dressed in our gear which is pictured below. Then we went in the transfer room which looked just like the ER room. The nurse set me up and the RE came in. My bladder was full enough so they did the transfer right away -- two embryos (both 4BB). The RE said they were great quality but didn't tell me they were 4BB. I just noticed it on the computer screen. I've googled about it and it seems they are excellent quality. I didn't feel much of anything during the procedure. It was easier than a pap smear and over in two minutes. I felt relief and excitement after it was over. I had to use a bed pan right away because my bladder was so full. Afterwards I laid there for 30 minutes. DH and just talked, relaxed and prayed.

We walked out of the center and I got in the little bed DH made me. I was able to sleep on the way home because I didn't feel much pain -- probably from the Valium. When we got home I slept some more. I finally got up, ate dinner and went back to bed. I woke up at 12 AM in tears. The stomach cramps and shoulder pains were back. I was so thirsty. I just cried and DH felt sorry for me. But what could we do? Just weather through it -- sit me up in bed and force Gatorade down my throat -- not really force it but it feels that way when I'm trying to down it. I slept sitting up most of last night. I feel much better this morning. I think laying down during most of the day and not drinking much Gatorade during the day was the cause of last night's drama. Laying down just causes the fluid to build up and not leave my body, especially if I'm not drinking fluid to keep things moving out.

I'm taking it easy today. I'm on bed rest today and tomorrow. I got a call this morning from my RE. There are 5 embryos to freeze. So we've got 5 frosties! He also apologized for being on vacation this past week. He just got back in the office this morning. I told him not to worry that I completely understood. We talked about everything that happened and how things were looking great with the exception of my OHSS symptoms. He thinks all of my issues after the ER (fainting, etc.) were related to my body's reaction to the anaesthesia. By the way, my RE's partner did everything this past week because my RE was out of town on vacation.

Advice on Shoulder Pain

Does anyone have any advice on how to relieve my shoulder pain? I had to sleep sitting up last night because it was too painful to lay down on my back, stomach or sides. It only hurts when I'm laying down. Weird, I know. But I'm concerned because my transfer is tomorrow and I have to lay down for the procedure as well as the following two days.

Other than that I didn't get a fever last night and I'm feeling better!

ER and Fertilization News

Good News:

30 eggs were retrieved!

Bad News:

Recovery wasn't a piece of cake!

I didn't have a good recovery experience. Let me start from the beginning. We arrived on time and met with our RE and anesthesiologist. Everyone was excited! DH went to do his thing: provide sperm! I went to back with the anesthesiologist. She told me to take my bottoms off, put on a gown and a hair net. I saw a girl in the recovery room that was knocked out (probably just resting though) and covered in blankets. She had just had her ER. I thought, okay, that's going to be me in a few minutes. Scary but I can do it! So I met the anesthesiologist in the room where ERs take place. It was a small room with lots of surgical looking stuff. There was another lady in there that was helping the anesthesiologist. They were both really nice. We laughed about a few things including how I would look after the ER. She said I would feel like I had a few drinks and would have to stumble over to the recovery room. We also talked about how terrified some women are right before their ERs. I told her I wasn't too nervous just excited. So while we were chatting I laid down on the table, put my legs in the comfy stirrups, had an IV started in my left arm and oxygen put in my nose. I remember her taping the tubes from the oxygen on my forehead. I remember saying that I was starting to feel a little weird. That's all I remember, until...

I woke up hearing the nurses say "Honey, you have fainted a couple times. Do you usually faint after procedures? Honey, sit up! It's time to go to the recovery room. Can you sit up?" Then I remember smelling something and saying "I smell something and no I don't usually faint after procedures!" The nurses eventually got me off the table and into a wheel chair. I don't really remember getting out of the wheel chair and into the comfy chair in the recovery room but I know it happened. DH walked in and looked a little shocked. I teared up when I saw him. DH and I spent the next 5 hours in the recovery room with constant monitoring: oxygen level (normal), heart rate (high), blood pressure (low) and hemoglobin (low). The nurses said I looked white as a ghost. I knew things weren't okay when they seemed nervous throughout those 5 hours. I felt light headed (like I was going to faint) and yucky. My shoulders and upper back hurt more than words can describe when I laid down flat. The RE decided to do an ultrasound (vaginal and abdominal) to look for possible fluid and/or blood. Surprisingly there wasn't much fluid or blood at all. I did have a small hematoma on my left ovary (pocket of blood). Finally the office decided I needed to be monitored in the HOSPITAL. DH and I were shocked, once again. But we didn't mind because I felt so weird I wanted to be monitored just in case something happened.

So off to the hospital we went with an IV in hand. By the way after the ER they took my IV after 30 minutes or so. I turned white as a ghost so they had to put another IV in my other arm. When we got to the hospital they took that IV out and started another one in my lower arm. I didn't care though because I felt so bad. I went through 5 or 6 bags of fluid. I slept sitting up most of my time in the hospital. DH was right by my side. Our Moms decided to drive together and come see us. It took them 4 hours to get there. After everything was normal again (oxygen level, heart rate, blood pressure and hemoglobin) we were discharged in the morning. The RE and our sweet nurse came to visit before we left. My nurse brought me a card and a "My First Bear." They both said they were most likely overtreating me by having me stay in the hospital but they thought the monitoring was being safe.

After getting my third IV started...

I have felt horrible since my ER. My major discomfort includes body aches, head aches, nausea and back pain. I'm not as bloated as I thought I would be. My stomach isn't really huge and tight but it's definitely bigger than usual. I'm downing Gatorade by the bottle which leads to emptying my bladder every hour. I had a fever last night of 101 but it went away with Tylenol. We've been in touch with our nurse and she said it's all normal (with the amount of eggs they retrieved) unless I have another fever that stays that high for a long period of time.

DH and I are blessed to have his Mom take care of us. She came home with us from the hospital and is staying until Sunday. She's been amazing! We have been shocked over this whole experience and are ready for it to be over. As I tell DH each waking moment "I'm sick of feeling like shit." He keeps reminding me that it will be worth it when we have those babies in our arms. We've decided we will not be doing another fresh IVF cycle. Instead we will be willing to do a frozen IVF cycle (if we have left over embryos from this cycle) or we will adopt. I think my ER experience isn't common so don't let it scare you. The RE said this only happens to his patients maybe once a year.

So here's the fertilization news:

12 fertilized naturally

6 fertilized with ICSI

(the rest of the eggs were immature)

18 going strong as of Wednesday!

5 DAY TRANSFER IS SET FOR SUNDAY!!!